While the setting varies from woman-to-woman, there’s a universal monologue that occurs to almost brides-to-be as she realizes this is the moment he’ll drop to one knee and pop the question. It’s a little dazed and confused — and a lot joyful. Here’s what it looks like.
1. Another beautiful day. The sun is shining, the birds are singing — I’m so glad my boyfriend suggested a trip to the beach.
2. But, wait. Why is he wearing a suit to the beach? I mean, I know it’s not exactly swimming weather, but jeez. Take it down a notch, buddy.
3. Why are we headed to the most secluded area possible? This is kind of weird.
4. And it’s actually a little windy. Maybe that’s why he’s jacket-clad. I think we should totally call it a day and head back to the car.
Photo: The Notey
5. OK, calm down, dude. We can totally hoof it another half mile while I freeze my buns off. No problem.
6. He’s digging in his pocket. He’s getting down on one knee. There’s a ring. Oh. My. God. This all makes sense now. I’m about to be proposed to!
7. Tears. So many tears.
8. And now, a complete blackout. I can see words are coming out of his mouth, but I’ll have to plead the fifth if anyone asks me what he actually said.
9. Why are you just staring at me? Oh! Yes! Of course yes. A thousand times yes!
10. Let’s call everyone we know. And let’s tell everyone we see on the walk back to the car. Hey! Look at my new ring that my fiancé gave me!
Photo: Cosmopolitan
12. OK, no more calls. We are the only two people in the world, and this is what Facebook’s for. *Changes status.*
13. So this ring is mine now? And I wear it on public transit every day? Without a bodyguard?
14. How do people take those ‘Pinteresty’ ring pics? Do I hold my hand in the air or put it on a table? Fingers together or separate? Wow, I never noticed that my fingers look like craggy witch fingers.
15. I should’ve gotten a manicure. Of course my left ring finger is the one that looks all chipped and shitty. Why couldn’t it have been you, right thumb?
16. Why do I look insane in all these Just Engaged selfies? Oh, because I’m grinning like the Cheshire goddamn cat instead of doing my perfectly rehearsed and controlled Picture Smile.
17. How do I tell my coworkers?
18. Wait, let’s give it a day to enjoy being engaged. I guess I don’t have to buy everything in the wedding ads all over my Facebook right this second.
19. I will stop staring at my hand. No, I won’t.
Photo: The Brides: